You may not realize it from this blog, but I actually do love to write. I swear.

It has recently dawned on me that my life has been lacking in a certain area for me to become the prolific writer I could be in my own mind. Quite frankly, what stops me is that I really just don't have anything to talk about. I'm happy and my life is great. And who in hell wants to sit in front of their computer and read about how great I think my life is? However, something has recently re-surfaced in my life over the past month that has attempted to penetrate my happier-than-thou bubble. An annoyance so distinct that it can only be one thing: Drama. My life had, until recently, been drama free for years. 

Over the past two months friction has surfaced between myself and a friend and my grandmother passed away. You know, until these unfortunate circumstances I didn't realize how truly lucky that I have been these past few years. And what I realize is in the aftermath is that I'm still lucky in spite of this all and each of these situations has taught me something about life that either I already knew and until recently chose to ignore or that people can still surprise me, no matter how much I think I know.

Now that the dust has begun to settle and I am processing the events of the past couple of months, I am finally articulating what I want a new chapter in my life to contain. I have a clearer view on what I will strive to stand for in my life, what I will fight for and what I will let go. In all of this I have realized the importance of letting go of things (even people) that in the grand scheme of life are really of no importance, especially when all they do is make you want to stab yourself in the face to avoid their stupidity. Life is too short to live it in a state of annoyance. My life should be lived on my own terms, with my own happiness, and I will never apologize for my life and what I have worked hard for to make it become something that I wanted it to be.

I still want to use this blog to tell the stories that made me who I am today and document who I will become. But bear with me, as I just recently remembered that I actually do have a story to tell. And if I do say so myself, it's a good one. But where do I begin and how? There is so much to tell and I want to tell it all. I guess that is what I need to figure out. Stay Tuned... 

  

Shortly after getting engaged three years ago, I decided that I was finally ready to take the leap with John and purchase a home of our own. Buying a home was something John had held in high regard for years and I had quite a different opinion. I was scared, quite frankly, because I had just begun working at a job where I actually made real money and could spend it on frivolous items like Burberry coats and Kate Spade handbags. I really wasn't looking forward to being house poor just to live someplace, that in my opinion, would be just like our current apartment with nicer appliances.

So, after that great trip to New York City I consented and we began house hunting. First off, we made a list of requirements (Lakeview/Lincoln Park area, vintage rehab, on premise washer and dryer, etc.) and items that we could live without (like in-unit washer and dryer, central heat and air, etc). Naturally there were some things that were more important to us as individuals as well which we chose to factor into our home search:

The items that were more important to me:
 1. I didn't want to be so house-poor that I couldn't enjoy the remainder of my 20's.
2. The house, under no circumstances, could be haunted.

The items that were more important to John:
1. It would be a good investment.
2. We would want to stay long-term.
3. The re-sale value would be high. 
4. It would be a good investment.
5. Good investment, blah blah blah....
6. Outdoor space for a grill.

So obviously, I left John to do the heavy lifting when it came to working out the financials and choosing a property that would be a 'good investment'. While I was more concerned with the aesthetics and finding something 'cute'. Within a couple of months of intensive searching we found a realtor along with many places we just didn't want. Some were far too small, the layouts were awkward, the building just seemed janky, etc.

Until one day, I found it online. The cutest condo ever.... EVER! In our price range, vintage rehab (built in 1904 and renovated in the 90's and again by the previous owners), close to the L, in Lakeview (an awesome block no less), good space, big back porch (grilling!), on site washers and dryers, and central heat and air (major bonus since most vintage buildings still have radiator and window units). Could it be more perfect? No? So in a rush John and I called our realtor to check this place out, and we fell in love. After a brief negotiation, in our car driving down to So-ILL to visit friends, we agreed on an offer and begun the process of buying our first home.

I have to admit, being a homeowner is a lot more rewarding than I thought it could be. I absolutely love our place. I love decorating, I love the flowers on my back porch, and I love making the place ours. Hell, I even tolerate going to Home Depot which is a place that used to send me into a hissy.

So what could spoil living in such a great, nay perfect, place? Condo Associations. Condo Associations are the bane of my sweet little buildings existence and in hindsight there are so many things that we would have watched out for "If Only We Had Known Better (TM)". It is absolutely ridiculous that my idiot neighbors can affect the worth of all the units. From having renters that destroy the common areas to a unit in foreclosure, can completely screw the environment of the building. I mega-loath Condo Associations, especially one, of which I serve as the Treasurer. 

There will be more ranting on this topic to come...

 

Okay Pandora. When I created a new station entitled 'Smashing Pumpkins Radio', I did not mean for it to be an open invitation to play every single shitty song from the late 90's in addition to Pearl Jam's "Rearview Mirror" greatest hits collection and Nirvana's MTV unplugged album. All. Day. Long.

Granted, the Pearl Jam and Nirvana, I am happy with. But, do you consider the Smashing Pumpkins to be similar to Sublime and Cake? Eagle-Eye Cherry? Really? Aren't you supposed to be choosing other songs on a 'Sounds Like' basis? I guess if I had to pick a band with 'similar' sound to the Pumpkins I couldn't really do it since they did have an eclectic sound. So, is your decision based solely on the 90's Alternative genre? In that case, then why the onslaught of 90's one-hit wonders? Hello Third Eye Blind!

Perhaps, you are trying to mock me Pandora? Are the mid-90's suddenly passe and we are currently only nostalgic for the 2000's? Or is it the 80's that are still cool? Are you saying my taste in music is that of some average 90's teenager who only liked Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and shitty songs that I could drive my beater car around my one-horse town trying to alleviate the boredom of my high school days? Well, if that is the case then you may be partially correct in that assessment. However, I also liked Aerosmith.   

Furthermore, the Pumpkins have an entire catalog of music beyond 1999. They came out with at least 2 maybe 3 albums that I cannot remember the names of, but they were released! On CD and maybe even iTunes at some point. And I'm sure somebody out there listened. I also read somewhere recently that the Pumpkin's are releasing a new album sometime soon. Where are the songs from that?! The article stated that Billy Corgan is now in his mid-40's and still cranking out the hits with his unique brand of teenage angst with a self-indulgent grown-up twist. No? Still not interested?

Then, fine. I give up and will go back to my Beatles Radio.